Hard to believe four decades are gone, atleast for me, and I'm in my fifth. Time flies! Ushering in the new year brings thoughts of the journey that lies ahead. A new year, a new decade, welcome to 2010.As next week approaches I'm a little anxious, excited and frankly humbled with what God has given me. What's that old saying ... "to whom much is given, much is expected". I say, bring it on! Of course I spend every waking hour thinking about my ministry and where God will use me. But I've also been consumed with the idea of making a documentary. Who will God bring to help me with it? Can I possibly obtain the equiptment necessary to do so? How long will it take? Who is my audience? What is the basis premise of the film? So many questions it's mind boggling. Art, writing, film making, all these things I am not. And then I think back to what I know for sure ... that God will use me in a public way. God will require that I step outside of my comfort zone. He will use me to build community, build bridges, promote reconciliation and create understanding.
The film will require interviews, but when? It will require filming locations and object, easy enough. It will require specific music - which my songwriter spouse is happy to provide. It will require marketing. It's quite an undertaking but I believe this is a definite path I am to be on.
Tonight I remembered an old friend, a woman I met at a Soul Force rally several years ago. At the time of our meeting she had recently left the employment of a subsidiary of Focus on the Family and was having a religious battle in her coming out. She attended church a few times, we socialized on a number of occassions and had coffee a couple of times. She and I came from different places but found a common bond that to this day I'm not sure I understand. I'd lost contact with her after Jaida was born. But her name came to me tonight and I 'Googled' her. This friend of my is a documentary film maker, producer and graphic designer now living in Seattle. Interesting!
Perhaps all those years ago our paths crossed for the purpose of future collaboration. Funny how God works. I was lucky enough to find an address and will be sending her snail mail this next week. What are the chances?
This next year, and decade, has so much change in store for all of us. My classes start next week. My new position at work begins in February. And through the past few months God has been breaking me down, bit by bit, to prepare me to be resculpted. Those layers are being stripped away. My weaknesses have been brought to light. My strengths are being used in brand new ways. And parts of me that I didn't know existed are surfacing. Simply, I am wet clay.
If nothing else, I hope and pray to better understand love and promote peace. Peace within myself, within my marriage, within my family, my church, my city, my country, the world. That's a large order but God gave us so many talents and abilities that if we ever amassed them and put them to task it wouldn't seem such an undertaking. I want to be a vessell to promote understanding and elicit knowledge that conquers ingorance and fear. I want to be a vessell to promote reconciliation that transcends self. I want to be a vessell to inspire love that knows no bounds. I want to be a vessell to promote peace. God I pray that you will use me, as Jaida would say, in 'HUGE' ways. Allow me to be your voice, to be tenacious when facing challenge and to continue to follow the path you predetermined.
I am ready to step out in faith, outside my comfort zone, outside of the box.
